date your kid series: isca + mama

You know the phrase, “The squeaky wheel gets the grease?” Let’s just say I have two squeaky offspring and my darling Isca never makes a peep. She is just so sweet and content and good. Noa and Hollis aren’t bad but they need constant work their entire waking hours- redirection, explanations, reminding, nagging, time outs, etc. Isca loves to do what she is supposed to do- homework, jobs, playing…she has to do it all the right way, all the time.

date your kid series isca radmomcoolkid.com

Anyway, I decided to take Isca out on a date, just the two of us, all her choice, since she is so low-maintenance and doesn’t get as much face-time with me as the other two. Here is her dream date, in 10 steps:

Step 1: Wear bright pink leggings, a too-small Hawaiian turtle print dress Nana made her when she was 2, leopard print shoes, and a purple winter coat.

Step 2: Go to Target. Purchase sugary drinks and candy at The Dollar Spot.

Step 3: Sneak snacks into the movies to see Frozen, for the second time!!!

Step 4: Sit on mom’s lap, still wearing the coat, and cause her legs to fall asleep because her booty is so dang bony, for the entire movie.

Step 5: Sing all the songs, realllllly loudly. Not notice that people are staring. Not caring that nobody in the theater is also singing. Smile so big when you nail those high notes. Not notice that mom is wondering if she should say something, then decide not to because, dang, it takes balls to do what she’s doing, and she’s 5 so what are people going to do?

Step 6: Wait until the very end of the credits so we can see the monster put on the crown. Realize only one other person stayed that long: a middle aged man with a long beard and a dark hat. Be kind of creeped out about him.

Step 7: Realize we are totally alone in the theater and can do whatever we want!!! Decide that what we want to do is walk right under the screen because she’s never been that close to it.

Step 8: Hold hands and smile and run to the car because Hawaiian prints don’t mix with Utah in the winter. Lame.

Step 9: Call dad to see if Noa is asleep. He isn’t. Tell dad we are NOT coming home until he is zonked out. This is girls’ night, after all.

Step 10: Go back to Target to play with the toys, look at the clothes, try on swim suits (um, kinda slutty for a 5 year old, Target), and splurge on a fake American Girl Doll accessory puppy that is on sale for $0.88. Go to the same check out person as when we bought the snacks a few hours earlier. Smile so big and wave to our new best friend since he doesn’t even ask if we need a bag and just hands the dog over.

date your kid isca radmomcoolkid.com

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